I Still Remember Them

BY ARLENE HARDER, MA, MFT

This poem, with links to an illustrated version, expresses the experience of recovery from loss of someone from whom you've learned much and shared many adventures.

The poem on the right expresses the experience of recovery from the loss of someone from whom you have learned much and with whom you've shared many adventures. In the weeks and months after they have died (or have been taken from you by divorce or another unfortunate reason), it's not surprising you can be going about your ordinary business when suddenly a thought of that person will break into your consciousness.

At first these flashes of memory come frequently and unbidden. Later they retreat somewhat. Nevertheless, they can be recalled deliberately when you want to be strengthened and encouraged by the way their character was expressed in life.

If you have lost a special person, view a self-directed slide show and notice whether you have used these experiences to remember the good times you had together.

Illustrations for slower connections

Illustrations for faster connections

I STILL REMEMBER THEM

Right after my father, my mother, and my friend died,

I thought of them often.

Because we shared so much of life,

there was much in life to remind me of them.

That is why I thought of them often in the rising of the sun.

I thought of them often when hiking along a stream

. . . or on a mountain trail.

I thought of them often in the cold of winter

. . . and on a pleasant summer day.

I thought of them often if I noticed a fern uncurling

. . . or a butterfly alighting on a flower.

I thought of them often on foggy days

. . . or when the sun broke through the clouds.

I thought of them often when walking down familiar streets

. . . or through foreign cities.

I thought of them often when I was alone at the beach

. . . or in a crowd.

I thought of them often when summer turned to fall

. . . and evening turned to night.

Now that my father, my mother, and my friend

have been gone for many years,

I don't think of them as often as before.

But memories of them still live in my heart

and I can think of them whenever I want to.