Thinking of Someone

BY ARLENE HARDER, MA, MFT

Needing an illustration for this piece, I decided to use the one above because it says she's "thinking" of someone, although it isn't the kind of thinking this Take-a-Break has in mind. But I found it cute and decided I'd put it here to give you a mini-take-a-break in which I ask my readers what caption they think is most appropriate. You can send me your answer by using the contact us link above. (Unfortunately, this lady's blind date got waylaid by someone else.)

In any case, the idea for this Take-a-Break began several years ago when I got an e-mail with a poem called "Right Now" (author unknown). The theme was that the person who sent it wanted me to know she was thinking fondly of me when she clicked the send button.

The poem begins with, "Right Now somebody is thinking of you. Somebody is caring about you. Somebody misses you. . . ." It then goes on to list forty-six other things that "somebody" is doing at this moment, like hoping you aren't in trouble, wanting you to find him or her, wanting to hug you, etc.

Because I don't care for long lists of ideas (forgetting half of what I read as soon as I close the e-mail window or put away the paper), I won't repeat all of the pleasant wishes you can have for a friend, but you can use the general concept in this Take-a-Break by taking a moment, as suggested above, to think of somebody right now.

It's very easy. Just take a deep breath, close your eyes and allow an image to arise of someone with whom you would like to spend a moment right now — if you could. The person might be any one of your relatives or an old or new friend. As you allow the wonderful feeling of connection to lighten your day with a pleasant memory of your relationship, imagine what you would you like to say to that person. Even without a list to prompt you, your heart knows the good things you would want to say or give this person if you could.

You may be lucky to already have the person with whom you'd like to spend a few moments right there with you as you read this. In that case, you can still do the M-B by closing your eyes and reflecting on the love and friendship you share — and then tell that person what your wish for them was.

However, if the person you would like to spend some time with isn't near, why not take this Take-a-Break one step further and pick up the phone? You'll both be glad you did. All you need to say is simply say, "I was thinking of you right now and decided to call."

Whether or not you are able to call that person, you can continue the benefits of this Take-a-Break for the rest of the day by thinking of him or her as often as you possibly can. Before you know it, it will be the end of the day. Then you will find that all the separate times you've thought of somebody special has added up to a whole day in which the love you share with your friend has strengthened and sustained you through what might otherwise have been, for any number of reasons, a difficult day.

© Copyright 1999, Revised 2005, Arlene Harder, MA, MFT